Why Do I Stay?

Hands down, my most requested service is from women asking for help to break free from a toxic relationship. Without exception, the first contact with me comes while they are still engaging with the partner, answering their calls, and responding to texts.

Also with very few exceptions, the woman is not the one choosing to end it, but WISHES she was making the decision.

This is an addiction, like any drug. Be very real with yourself, you ARE getting something out of this. What is it feeding in you? What is it numbing in you? What is it waking up in you?

I am going to begin a series of exercises and rituals for those who are in this spot. Why? Because I am not letting you hire me from this spot. It is a total waste of money.

In year 2 of being a personal trainer (long, long ago) I learned a valuable lesson. Don’t do specialized service work for a paycheck, do it for a result.  If the client doesn’t get results, that is on me.

The day I had this realization, I “fired” a client that was VERY prominent in our community and a regular paycheck for me.  I did not have a ton of other clients at the time, I was barely making ends meet, but I was not helping her. That client wanted to tell people she had a personal trainer, but didn’t want a personal trainer. Nothing changed in her in one year with me. She wouldn’t do anything I asked. She brought magazine workouts to our sessions and made me watch her do them.  The decision to fire her changed my life.  Now 25 years down the road, I have stuck to that rule. I can help people if they are READY to be helped, I cannot help people because they write a check.

I know how harsh that feels to some people, and I am prepared to ignore your victim messages. I don’t care what you think about me. Calm down and finish reading. I am going to give you some very tangible exercises that you can start using to get you to a place to BE READY.

For the women that are in these abusive relationships, that aren’t ready to disengage.. my advice is to start with yourself. Work on your own introspection and self-respect, self-love, self-care until you are ready to move on.  Moving out is not moving on.  When you can stop replying to text messages and phone calls, then you may be ready for the kind of work I can do with you and I promise you, I will be here and I WILL help you cut the cords, clear the stuck energy, heal the karmic patterns and wake up your Goddess energy.  For now, let’s unlayer the garbage so that you can live authentically.